The Thread of Letting Go: From Heartbreak to Healing
Healing is a process—an imperfect, ever-evolving journey.
It’s not about wiping the slate clean or pretending the past didn’t happen. Instead, it’s about understanding it, carrying it differently, and discovering who you are on the other side. For me, this journey has been deeply intertwined with music. Certain songs have become markers of my emotional milestones, tracing the path from heartbreak to healing, from love to self-discovery. These songs have changed in meaning over time, reflecting both who I was and who I’m becoming.
Here’s the story of my journey, told through five songs that have defined it.
Closer – Tegan and Sara (2012)
Written by identical twins Tegan and Sara Quin, “Closer” was released in 2012 as the lead single from their album Heartthrob. The song is an upbeat, synth-pop anthem about intimacy, connection, and the thrill of falling in love. It captures that euphoric, electric feeling of wanting someone completely—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
How it resonated then: When I first connected with this song, I was falling head over heels, caught up in the magic of a this new relationship. The lyrics, “All you think of lately is getting underneath me,” perfectly mirrored the passion and intensity we both felt in those first days. It was about surrendering to love and believing in all its possibilities.
How it resonates now: Today, “Closer” is a snapshot of innocence and hope. It reminds me of the beauty in allowing myself to fall, even knowing the risks. It’s a bittersweet memory but one I’ve learned to treasure for the joy it brought in its time.
““It’s not just all physical / I’m the type who won’t get oh so critical.””
Set Fire to the Rain – Adele (2011)
“Set Fire to the Rain,” written by Adele and Fraser T. Smith, was released in 2011 as part of her iconic album 21. The song is a powerful ballad about the devastation of heartbreak and the moment you realize a love you held onto so tightly is slipping through your fingers. Its imagery of fire and water colliding reflects the intensity of emotions in a tumultuous relationship.
How it resonated then: At the height of heartbreak, this song was my anthem. The lyrics, “I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell, you rose to claim it,” hit hard. It captured the duality of love—how it can lift you to great heights and also leave you shattered when it ends.
How it resonates now: Listening to it today, I feel more reflective than raw. The pain is still there, but it’s distant, a memory rather than a present wound. “Set Fire to the Rain” reminds me of the strength it took to let go and the beauty in surviving something so consuming.
“I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell, you rose to claim it,”
Lost on You – LP (2016)
Laura Pergolizzi, known professionally as LP, released “Lost on You” in 2016. The song is a haunting reflection on a relationship that didn’t survive. With its raw lyrics and soulful delivery, it’s a toast to the dreams, hopes, and pieces of yourself that get lost along the way.
How it resonated then: In the aftermath of heartbreak, “Lost on You” became my grieving song. The lyrics, “Let’s raise a glass or two to all the things I’ve lost on you,” perfectly encapsulated how it felt to mourn not just the person but the version of myself I had been with them. It was a way to honor what was gone while beginning to release it.
How it resonates now: Today, “Lost on You” feels like a closing chapter. It’s a reminder of what I’ve let go of—not just the relationship but the weight of that loss. It’s become a song of freedom, marking the moment I stopped looking back.
“Let’s raise a glass or two to all the things I’ve lost on you,”
Yellow – Coldplay (2000)
Released in 2000 as part of their debut album Parachutes, Coldplay’s “Yellow” is a gentle, heartfelt ode to love and admiration. Written by the band’s lead vocalist Chris Martin, the song’s lyrics speak to a profound and selfless kind of love, paired with a celestial, dreamlike quality.
How it resonated then: For much of my life, “Yellow” felt like it was about someone else—a person I’d poured my light into, thinking they were my whole world. The line, “Look at the stars, look how they shine for you,” felt like an offering, a declaration of how deeply I cared.
How it resonates now: Rediscovering “Yellow” after my heartbreak was transformative. I began to see it not as a song about someone else but as one about me. Those stars have always been shining for me. It’s become a song of self-love and recognition, a reminder that my own light is enough.
“Look at the stars, look how they shine for you”
Happy – N.E.R.D. (2008)
From the 2008 album Seeing Sounds, N.E.R.D.’s “Happy” is a vibrant, energetic track that embodies pure joy and empowerment. The lyrics, “I feel so alive, I’m in overdrive, I’m killin’ it,” are unapologetic in their celebration of life and confidence.
How it resonated then: When I first heard this song, it felt like a dream—a distant hope that one day I’d feel that alive and empowered again. It was aspirational, a promise I made to myself during the darker days.
How it resonates now: Today, “Happy” is my reality. It’s not that life is perfect, but I’ve found joy again, and it’s bold and unapologetic. I’m in a place where I can genuinely say, “I’m killin’ it,” and mean it. It’s not just about surviving anymore—it’s about thriving.
“I feel so alive, I’m in overdrive, I’m killin’ it,”
Looking Back, Moving Forward
Each of these songs tells a part of my story, from falling in love to losing it all, to finding my way back to myself. They’ve evolved in meaning, just as I have. What once reflected my pain now highlights my growth. Heartbreak no longer defines me; it’s just a piece of my journey. The healing continues, imperfect and ongoing, but I’m no longer stuck.
Music has a way of meeting us where we are and showing us where we’ve been. These songs are a map of my evolution, a reminder of how far I’ve come, and an anthem for the road ahead.
Add in that I am currently in a new relationship for the past year and see a completely different life for myself. I am excited about the new adventures and self discovery
